First of all let's toast some absent friends. Rapid and Globes, who put so much into helping Blow Felt organise this extremely successful trip and watched our every move on WhatsApp: only to have the Big Event stolen away from them by a granddaughter who still hasn't been polite enough to turn up. And Double Entry: much will be made of the record-creating run of Posh Nosh Awards and the controversial way in which yet another was snatched away on this very weekend, so best not to dwell on it. Perhaps all 3 – and others – will think better and not stay at home next time.

Next thanks to our Host Hash for following up a super run with a well crafted Nature Trail and advice on the ways of the world. GM Birdwoman, sister of our very own Pussies Galore, provided the inspiration and was on top form in control of the massive circle, well supported by RA Skid Marc. Hare Mixer talked us through his trail with style and wit, and Swahili Swinger served up some great Nosh. Breaking Glass ‐ dubbed Breaking Wind by Rubber Duck – turned up at Bangers' superb BBQ with food, wine and leg wrestling, and the following morning took us on a splendid walk from our Villa, a feat The Count would have struggled to equal (and yes, Camping Mug is holding a real chameleon). And let's not forget – how could we? – King Sir Sir James who played the role of An American Abroad to perfection.

And so to the R*n. This started with a sequence of events that would have given DE a glimmer of hope. We set off from our villa in 4 cars and instructions from Blowers to stay in convoy. He was last just behind Lady P who was guided by The Count who was clutching a bung from DE and soon lost Blowers. Now Blowers had no idea of the Hash location, telephone calls did not help and his chances of making 1493 looked slim. As luck would have it he had a chance encounter with a hotel he had stayed in before, followed by a chance encounter with 3 youngsters who looked like hashers, but weren't, but did know the area the hotel directed him to. He arrived at 2 minutes to hash having brought one of the lads with him as a guide. Unlucky DE, I'll refund the bung, and well done Blowers.

Lots of traditional hash stuff from the locals and that rather put the wind up a few of the "WI Hash" Hfivers. We waved goodbye to The R*nners (with 12km to go and 0 from H5) and embedded ourselves in The Wa*kers (8km which was more than enough in what was glorious weather: glorious for lounging around). With Knobber incapacitated following the loss of a stabiliser while cycling, this particular party were not especially well set up to provide FRBs. However The Count, Bangers, Nik Nak and Knee Trembler all made commendable efforts to at least walk fast and did a reasonable amount of shouting enthusiastically. At least until the very welcome and impressive Beer Stop.

Thereafter the shouting became a little more desperate and the trail finding more difficult, especially in wooded areas as darkness fell: and so did Nik Nak. Of course making sure a young man was on hand to help her to her feet, luckily only a few metres from the On Inn.

The circle was again much more traditional, noisy and boisterous, than we are used to, and The Count struggled to hold his own as stand-in GM, HM and RA combined (where was Rapid when we needed him?): imagine Sergeant Wilson at an SAS piss up. He would like to thank Atomic and Bangers for accepting unjustified down-downs with such good grace.

All in all it was a super R*n and all in all it was a super week that I think we all enjoyed tremendously. Well done Blowers for organising the week, for the tough Treasurer Hunt (won deservedly by Lady P and The Count), for the very enjoyable Wine Tasting trip, for the excellent Bangers BBQ (and food that lasted for days), for the local walk guide and especially for finding the superb villa.

ON ON TO WHEREVER WE END UP NEXT YEAR

The Count