It's fair to say that Blow Felt did all the work for this trail, checking out the route, organising the restaurant and even ensuring that the sun shone, so my responsibilities are just to jot down a few words to record my observations of Hash 1408.

A new venue for the hash, an Indian restaurant in a former pub with plenty of parking for us to use, unlike The Blackbirds next door but one, who have put in place a Pay and Display system which makes the Dunstable parking fiasco look thought through. I'm sure that Fat Controller, (rejected) councillor in waiting would have had an opinion or three here!

The morning started with Leroy losing his shoe horn, only to then find it in his shoe, which just happened to be on his foot and then continued with him losing his car keys, which were found in his pocket. Capt F looked on with envy. It has now been 1 year and 27 days since he last lost his keys.

The circle was called and with no birthdays (apart from G) [pedants may say its his deathday ..ed] all set out along Flitwick High Street. Turning by the chip shop (not run by Elvis) the pack leaders struggled to find the trail at the next check forcing Capt F to head off down a long false trail.

Not content with losing shoe horns and keys, Leroy lost himself on the next section only to reappear on a false trail calling to the pack who obediently obeyed. Wet Wipe take note.

Crossing the road, through more alleys we headed out to a small wood, where the pack split to the Rapid Runners (Capt F, DC & Claptrap) and the Blow Felt "bugger that" group of everybody else. The running loop allowed the walkers to get in front and to head through the woods and back into the maze of alleys.

Before the long straight the runners caught up again only to find a large number to the back duly ignored by all but the most athletic. The trail continued parallel to the railway line with Cyclopath almost requiring surgery as she crossed a spike fence.

Back at the restaurant beers were awarded to the hares, water to Leroy and more beer to Blow Felt. He really must be a distant relation of Forking.

Golden Globes tossed the RA's cock into the circle only for it to be handed back to Rapid for another stay in the garage. As DE was uncertain if she was wearing purple (nothing visible), a small reminder was awarded for her to wear next week.

In the restaurant the buffet was served and beer was consumed, during which time Count (600 Runs) and Lady P(500 Runs) were presented with a book of Hash photos for their Joint Award.

All left full and content, eager to try on a red dress for next week's run.

On On to 1409 set by Bangers at the King William IV, Cockernhoe.

Rapid