Wordz – sang to the traditional song of:
'The Clanger from Old Bedfordshire'

Oh! A H5 hasher from old Bedfordshire
Set a run from the Cross Keys – Pulloxhill
FC was his name!
He were n't new to this game
As too was drinking lots of real ale.

Circle Up! Was called loud and clear
And Splashy – her birthday volunteered
Then Forkin' – poor thing
Showed Rapid his ring
from which he became very queer.

Oh! The trail started off with a cheer!
As the pack dithered there and o'er here
Then, ON – ON! was bawled
To the fields – left they trawled
The Knitting Circle set at the rear.

O'er ditches and fields led false trails
With the pack venting moaning and wails
Hare FC with glee
Showed true Hash dignity
And laughed like a drain – loud and clear

A check by the Meadhook appeared
Hash Flash with his camera was geared
He took snaps of the pack
with The Clappers out back
The Knitting Circle then disappeared.

John Bunyan had once trodden here
His trail is marked well around here
But a false trail showed clear
To curses and jeers
As the trail – hidden right lingered near

Portobello (in London) – well known
A place where the pack now do roam
But the Cattle in herds
produced lots of turds
from the pack, as the animals closed

Now, Kisses was co-hare – she steered
the Knitting Circle to a watering hole where
she proffered no cold beer
just jellies and ice cold Pims!
Here! Here! Here!

On – Inn' to the pub led the trail
To where Sticky Wicket was the favourite ale
Then 'Circle Up' was called
To the forecourt we crawled
Thus the proceedings prevailed.

Now, naming a 'new boot' is an important thing
The hash handle comes with a sting
As Jenny – poor thing
Was named 'Courtesan'
A 'Mistress' to our 'grand calling'!

ON – ON! To infirmity, and beyond!
Fat Controller.