Run 1336

Sunday 16 October 2016

Chiltern Open Air Museum


Hares: Thongo and Nik Nak


Hasherdabber reveals birthday suit

Blow Felt models the shirt in style

Gorjoyce and Pongo were at the birth

Thongo and Nik Nak arranged the party

Nicey is victim of bizarre punishment

H5 birthday? It must be Cake #1

The queue outside MEN

The queue for WOMEN

The Hash at their own convenience

Lady P seeks extra cover in barn

Peacher's turn to be the Mad Hatter

Lost Cause gets amorous with Nessie

A snap of Double Entry is a Lost Cause

Hare's welly warning was too late

Gorjoyce reporting Bangers

Depth Charge has a sniff of the pub

Oscar takes an interest in Rapid's pussy

Is that Smiffo in the knitting circle?

Shuffle slumps into food

Shock as Gorjoyce drinks not throws

Gone Or Ill is named ...

... and scores direct hit with first down-down

Count amused by RA accusations

Embarrassment as GM nicks brolly

Blow Felt can look us in the eye ...

.. and use "while you're down there" line

And to finish ... Cakes #2

The heavens opened up, the M25 was enshrouded in a cloud of misty spray, the narrow lanes became fast running streams, and then in true hashing form the sun came out. Lady P was sharp off the mark handing out the super new long sleeve T-shirts before we started on a visit to the museum. A whole chapter could be written about our historical discoveries which included Bangers' well remembered 1770s Leagrave Cottage and Blow Felt's first hand experience of ancient farm machinery (better not say they could be museum pieces, practically everyone else remembered similar exhibits they had thrown away as "old junk").

On circling up it was hard to believe that just Gorjoyce and I had been on the very first run that started from the Hare & Hounds pub in Old Warden but a true privilege to be to be laying this one with Nik-Nak, my fellow Hash Thrash.

Having laid the trail on Wednesday, the rain had taken its toll on some of the flour markings but soon the FRBs were checking out every false trail and many which weren't but formed part of the Chiltern Way.

After a few narrow footpaths the pack was soon out into the open fields of Chalfont Common and across the newly seeded Horn Hill and onto a whisker away from the Dumb Bell pub.

It was then northwards up the narrow Old Shire Lane [marking the border between hertfordshire and buckinghamshire i believe ..ed] and back to the car park through the playing fields of Newland Park (Newland's College is now a private school)

It was only a short drive to the Dumb Bell where most enjoyed a hearty roast lunch before circling up.

At table Ringer and Depth Charge were busy comparing their Strava and the results were: Ringer 3.6 miles in 58mins 04 sec, Depth Charge 4.6 miles in 51 min 13 sec (must have run more than all the false trails) and not to be left out Rapid came in at 4.3 miles in 52min 16 sec.

Rapid tried to embarrass a number of non-runners by asking them what they thought of the run before descending on Lady P who said she was "so thrilled this morning" then paused only to hear Count Roadkill reply "that's the best compliment I've had for years". Lady P was talking about the rain stopping on cue!

Down downs were awarded to Gorjoyce for talking on her phone when hashing and Forking for boring the waitress about his recommend method of cooking a pudding. Yet another was given to Blow Felt for sexism regarding detailed explanation of foreplay on how to grease nipples.

For talking about the word W on the hash, Rapid and then Fat Controller came to realise that De De had not been named. Many a H5er will remember holy beer being sprinkled and she became known as Goneril and did hear utter the bards words? "Nay then – Why not by thy hand sir? How have I offended? All's not offence that indiscretion find... At your choice sir" (King Lear: Act 2 Scene 4)

We ended by eating Nik-Nak's bespoke 25th Anniversary logo cup cakes and Bangers offering to lay the run in 25 years time.


Pongo - still can't believe H5 started 25 years ago

To avoid disputes in 25 years time, the hares have asked for the names of attendees to be inscribed forever on a hard disk somewhere. They were: Nik-Nak, Thongo (aka Pongo), Bangers n Madge (with Milly), Bird Woman, Blow Felt, Count Roadkill, Custard, Depth Charge, Double Entry, Fat Controller, Forking Dickchair, Frau Krafty Rot (with Rudi), Goneril, Gorjoyce, Kisses Anytime, Lady Penelope, Lost Cause, Lush Big Knickers, Nicey, Peachers Tit, Pussies Galore, Rapid Withdrawal, Ringer, Screamer, Shuffle Cock, Smiffo, Spotted Dick and Submissive (with Oscar).