Run 1151

Monday 27 May 2013

The Lilley Arms, Lilley

Hares: Nik Nak, Knobber and Hairy Gusset

HASHERS: 19  MUTTS: 2  ANKLE BITERS: 1  APRES: 1

In my last words, I mentioned John Bunyan as Sir John Barleycorn's drinking partner. He also features in this week's run, as we follow another of his trails across Hertfordshire – leading, unsurprisingly, to a pub – The Lilley Arms. History does not relate who Lilley was, although there is a Lilley Hoo, but for the purpose of filling up lines on the Words, I will make something up. Lilley was John Bunyan's bird, and lived in what is now the pub. When he was off to see her, John would say that he was off into Lilley's arms - hence the name of the pub. There is also a Lilley Bottom, and we can only imagine that he spent a bit of time around there as well.

Anyway, about the run. Some of you may be familiar with the band Dire Straits, and their popular classic song "Telegraph Road" (The first track on their 1982 album, "Love over Gold"). The track is 14.18 minutes long, which is coincidentally the number of miles we covered on the track up to Telegraph Hill – called so because in the days of John and Lilley, it was the only place you could get a signal. Anyone with an ounce of local knowledge would know that it is not 14 odd miles from Lilley up to Telegraph Hill, but it was the way that we went.

So on the Saturday, we left the pub at 4pm to start laying the trail, returning just in time for the Hash on Sunday [got a feelin it was monday knobber ... scribe]and having recruited Hairy Gusset in to help after Nik Nak had put her back out "gardening". In fact, Nik Nak and Hairy stayed out there as live hares, trying to find the missing link between the two halves of the trail, whilst I legged it back to the pub in time for the circle. In the end, Nik Nak and Hairy did return in time for the On On, but only due to delay because I couldn't unlock the boot of Nik Nak's car so I could put my shorts in there, until Double Entry appeared and did it for me (I think I have phrased that sentence properly).

As it happened, we had put several fishhooks on the trail, so the pack was kept together reasonably well along the long drags up Wardswood Lane and across the fields to Mortgrove Farm, which at first sight of the sign looked like "Mortgage Farm". When laying the trail, it was at that point that Nik Nak and I could not reach an immediate agreement as to which way to go, so went on an exploratory walkabout and ended up back at the pub.

Having consulted the map further over a drink, we set off to lay a trail up to Telegraph Hill. Already disadvantaged by lack of crampons, and with the promised hilltop being "just over there behind the trees", imagine our horror to find that the horizon was nearer than the top of Telegraph Hill, and it was 3.40pm on Sunday [i really do think our correspondent means monday ... scribe]. So it was at this point that I made my way back and Nik Nak and Hairy began live haring, but, worryingly, arrived back at the pub as well.

Back at Mortgage Farm, the pack were confusedly milling around, rightly wondering where the trail was going. Nik Nak explained directions, and Double Entry concurred, and the pack set off along a short stretch of road to the Icknield Way path and towards the John Bunyan trail. As we had to be back at the pub before closing time, the Hares decided to ignore the trail partly leading up to Telegraph Hill, and return to the pub along the John Bunyan Trail, which joins onto "The Baulk" and the On Inn.

It was pretty uneventful on the run, just the usual people moaning, but not Subby, who ran to the back after each fishhook and never winged once - an FRB in the making. The main highlight was seeing White Rabbit, who had come along for the beer which, given the heat, dust and distance was probably the best option. And I must mention Lady P's korjet cake - absolutely (incr)edible.

In the circle, Down Downs were awarded to all three Hares, Lost Cause managed to offload the Hashit onto the GM to keep him warm after returning from Africa. Team RA Capt. Fantaaaastic and Forking took exception to Subby's rubber fetish and also with Bangers on a point I can't remember. There was a debate about length – 15" I believe, but who and why escapes me. 12" is sufficient, as a rule.

On On to Great Barford
Knobber, Nik Nak and Hairy Gusset