Run No 990

Monday 28 June 2010

Chez Ringer, Dunstable

Hare: Ringer

HASHERS: 7  ANKLE BITERS: 1  MUTTS: 0  NEWIES: 0  APRES: 1

Given the number of Hashers that are either away on duty at Interhash or in other parts foreign, this was always going to be a small turnout, but would it be, to borrow a phrase from the Tallin Hash, "small, but low quality". Small certainly but low quality? We would have to wait and see. In another attempt to defy the expectations of those coming to Hash in Dunstable: "Oh, it'll be the quarry, or the Downs, but hills anyway", Hare Ringer planned an alternative.

The roseate fingers of Monday's dawn promised another hot day and the promise was fully delivered. What was not promised, but arrived anyway was the fact that while emerging from his pit, the Hare pulled his back YET again and was rendered walking wounded. Ibuprofen gel came to the rescue (other pain relief treatments are available), but when I set off to lay the run, I could only just walk, let alone run. However over the next hour things improved and when it came to the second lap, I was moving quite freely ? beware this 'freedom' is an illusion (see later).

Asst RA Forking Dick Chair cycled up from nearby home, Last to arrive was Stallion accompanied by Matador, whom we have not seen for many a moon; Matador is now rapidly approaching his teenage years - oh lucky Stallion and BOF. Other Hashers were Capt F, Private Parts, Double Entry and Lush Big Knickers (note it's an 'I' not an 'O' in that last part of her name). PP called the circle to order and since there were no birthdays etc. it was handed straight over to the Hare, who announced that due to the aforementioned back, there were no bars or Ts, just many, many checks and numbered fishtails.

Previous history led PP to believe he knew the way and ran on no dust at all, completely missing the side road where the true trail lay. This led shortly to a check at which Capt F asked "Ooo, can we go down the underpass?" As this was indeed the right choice, the Hare kept stumm. Past The Glider pub we went before (eventually) disappearing down a cul-de-sac secreting a leafy lane. Just before the lane, disaster struck when RA FDC pulled up short, hobbling and complaining that something had gone POP in his leg. This is never good news, so he wisely withdrew and returned to base to retrieve his bike before attempting to pick us up again further round the course, but with very limited (i.e. no) success. Without an RA left on the run, Double Entry stepped smartly into the breach and went into Secret RA mode. The lane led back to the A5 road, which we crossed before heading through a residential estate by means of a baffling series of pedestrian-only back-doubles.

A footpath along the bottom of Blows Downs brought us back close to the centre of Dunstable. From here we went through the churchyard of what remains of the Priory Church, on which a short history lesson was given about Archbishop Cranmer announcing from the church on 23 May, 1533 the divorce of Henry VIII from Catherine of Aragon, and the separation of England from the Church of Rome...blah, blah, blah.

Crossing the A5 once more led us past the residence of Bangers 'n' Madge, where we chanced upon the good lady wife of said Bangers. Stopping briefly to say howdy, we pressed on across Bennett's Rec and wended our way back uphill to the On Inn.

If there had been a Good Craic award to be awarded it would definitely have gone to PP, who although matched by Capt F in being caught by ALL the number fishtails, at two of them PP was 1st AND 3rd to number-3 checks, so went to the back twice at each.

Back at chez Ringer, we were joined by RA Rapid Withdrawal who, absent for some weeks, has been sporting an injury that will not clear up, and is therefore for the time being a non-runner. A pasta supper was on offer which was consumed with gusto. At the circle, we had to run around a bit to make it look in the pics as though there were more of us. Down-downs were awarded to everyone for something or other, including humping (see side picture). Nearly all the accompanying photos are courtesy of Double Entry, this week's acting Hash Flash.

Post-hash note: Ringer paid the price for the earlier 'freedom' when the Ibuprofen wore off and the pain struck again - at 01:14 am to be precise. A nocturnal bathroom visit look the best part of 30 minutes, crawling on hands and knees, with a lot of teeth-gritting and the support of walls, doors, furniture or anything that came to hand. Drat, more drat and double-drat.

On-On to The White Hart next week at Upper Sundon.
Ringer