Run 908

The Wheatsheaf, Tempsford

Sunday, 21 December 2008

Hares: Shagpile & Underlay

HASHERS: 25  ANKLE BITERS: 1  NEWEES: 3  MUTTS: 4  APRES: 15

The H5 pack assembled, keen to start the run and after a brief circle, the hares indicated the ON-OUT.

It was a bit of a hack (1.05 miles to be exact) to the first check, but there were not too many moans, although at this point we lost a few hashers. Shaggy and Smiffo checked out a trail with no dust, and after running for a mile on naff-all found the last part of the trail and ran back to the pub. Rainbow's mum & dad decided that the pub had more attractions than the trail and disappeared, pronto.

A scenic trot along the river followed, with FRBs Giblets and Penetrator blatantly ignoring the fish-hook checks. The next check was designated a 'joke check' and just in case Ken Dodd or Jim Davidson didn't turn up for the run, the hares had provided a few quality jokes for the pack to read out. Much side splitting ensued before moving on with the run to a ladies check.

A small loop had to be negotiated before the Mulled Wine and Mince Pies check was reached. The knitting circle (AKA short-cutters) were already tucking in, but there was plenty to go around.

Although there seemed some reluctance to move off from the pie check, after a bit of cajoling, Forking Dick Chair fell for a falsie going in completely the wrong direction. Having called him back, it was up the hill where Count Roadkill took the lead. The trail led across the Blunham Road and behind some houses. Private Parts and Lady P were among the short cutters across an area used as a dump by the locals - bad move!

The next check was the Christmas Carol check and the hash went for it with gusto. Strong (almost in tune) voices disturbed the peace with Overflo, Flo, Rapid Withdrawal, Truly Scrumptious and Capt Fantaastic being particularly fortissimo. There was a welcome pause at the bridge over the river while we waited for Thongo and Dead Meat to catch up and after a photo was taken to record the occasion, it off over the miserable farmer's land. Sadly he didn't appear this time to entertain us with his antics, and before long the ON INN was found.

Once back at the pub, the non-combatants such a Gor Joyce, Smeg, Ward 1O, Merlot, Mrs Bangers and The Woman With Three Breasts', Mrs Forking (who it turns out only has two as per the norm) joined us.

At the circle, Team RA awarded down-downs to me, Shagpile for multiple reasons. Bangers for something or other, and RA Rapid Withdrawal with his usual off-the-wall thinking, to various H5 members for their doppelganger entries he had found when Googling.

ON ON to Saffron Walden (Gawd Help Us)