For a while now - since the last Red Dress Run in fact - Pussies has been promising Your Scribe a Red Dress Team photo. To the left is a picture she took herself before handing her camera to Wallah Bollox - the artist formerly known as Overflo, not much of a red dress man himself - for the official snap.

To the right is a still from one of three short video clips Wallah took. You may be able to see some of his finger and a glimpse of his technical advisor Flo. On the sound track I can hear him asking how he can tell if he has taken it yet....

Run No 812

Sunday, 1st April 2007

John O'Gaunt, Sutton

Hares: Shagpile & Underlay

HASHERS: 28  VISITORS: 5  RETURNEES: 0  MUTTS: 1


THE HARES...

AN APRIL FOOL...

A SILLY ASS...

FORKING DICKCHAIR IS NAMED...

LADY PEE, HASHIT FOR CHILD ABUSE...

SCREAMER, HASHIT FOR HIJACKING

A few hashers had taken the broad hint to dress appropriately for an April Fool's Day run; well done Pussies Galore and Gorjoyce. Although thinking about it, maybe there were a few others dressed as fools. I just didn't spot it!

It was good to see a group of Cambridge HHH join us for the run, although it turns out they had ulterior motives - see later.

After the brief formalities, the ON-OFF was indicated down towards Sutton ford. As with every other run ...???... led through the water and a very obvious bar prevented the pack from taking the dry route over the bridge. Now. in the past, this never worked ...???... tramp through the water at speed, leaving the vast majority to take the girlie route over the footbridge. On this occasion, to my amazement, ...???... the footbridge! However some strange sights were seen. Screamer hijacked a lift in late arrival Pussies Galore's car. Lady P and another clambered ...???... railings over the stream. Various others shrieked and screamed, causing a traffic jam of cars waiting to cross but eventually came through the water ...???... discover the reason for the 100% take-up. Underlay (Karate black-belt, 2nd dan) was guarding the way over the bridge armed with a pointed stick ...???... no-one fancied their chances against this martial-art qualified troll.

A long, long run out of Sutton and alongside the golf course followed. This split the FRBs from the fair-sized knitting circle that had to shortcut and as a result the Joke check was only seen by the fitter hashers. Forking Dickchair was first at that check and led the joke telling. The pack was then led on by Smiffo who spotted the local indicating the ONON into Pegnut Wood. This was the twin of the local who had earlier been at the ford but maybe not too many spotted him there.

The trail meandered through the woods, twisting and turning like a twisty-turning thing. Hashers at times were spread out all along many ...???... FRBs My Little Gelding, Capt Paintball and nearly always Walnut Whip Pooper leading the pack. After one final number check, which was ...???... fair play, I say. They should be banned) the ON-INN was discovered and a happy H5 trotted into the pub car park at exactly 60 minutes after the start.

Down-Downs were awarded jointly and severally by our own illustrious Asst. RA, Big Blouse and Cambridge's RA, Dave the Rave. ...???... (what was that about?), Screamer for the car hijacking incident, WWW for indecisiveness (he was caught sitting on a fence) Yours Truly for ...???... Cambridge crowd with the Good Crack patented dobbing machine and finally G-String for being an SAS hasher.

A naming ceremony then bestowed John with the wonderful hash name of 'Forking Dickchair', he being the wearer of deckchair patterned shorts and being employed as a fork lift truck driver.

Lastly, Cambridge went into an impressive sales spiel for their 1500 run celebrations on 29th June weekend.
See here for details if you want to go:
http://www.ch3-1500.co.uk/

And lastly, lastly; I'm a bit worried about G-String. He's taking to biting people so I've had him fitted out.

ON ON to Easter Monday run and BBQ (for Gorjoyce's benefit starting at 16:00 BST if you are on the old Anglo-Babylonian time, or 6.66 LMT [Local Metric Time] if using the recently introduced Metric Time).

Shagpile & Underlay

[...???... indicates where the original text has been obliterated by floaty pics - Archive Ed.]