Run No. 747 18th December 2005

Village Hall, Old Warden

Runners:  -
Mutts:  -
Ankle Biters:  -
Knitting Circle:  -
Apres:  -
Newies/Returnees:  -

Jumbo Run

It was a cold day. White fields as far as the eye could see with a bright sun in the sky. We set off at about 11 and by about 10 past Capt F had all ready managed to get himself totally lost down some trail. Knobber & I carried on and we managed to re-group when Capt F was eventually spotted wandering around behind us. His story was he thought we were some loving couple and couldn’t recognise us at a distance. After this insult we carried on and found a lonely Clarabel toy (for those that don’t know Clarabel is the name of one of the Thomas the Tank Engine coaches). We felt we had to pick it up and incorporate in into the run some how, but we never thought of any way of doing it. All Knobber would say is that Clarabel's cludgy was filled with bangers and mash. Neither I nor Capt F understood what on earth he was prattling on about. Eventually after he had repeated the Cludgy thing for about the tenth time, we had to ask. We wish we hadn't because by all accounts a Cludgy is a toilet, the 'bangers' were Richard the 3rds and the 'mash' is a used toilet roll. After giggling at this for a while we came across a most peculiar sight. There were two enormous metal trees in the middle of a forest. We thought we had to have a check here so we pondered over what to call the check. Eventually we decided to call it an ANUS (Anyone Notice any Unusual Structures).

The run started at 3:00 promptly. It was a fairly normal run. Every one was in high Christmas spirits. We had skippers (WWW and Scooper). We had men in sexy Christmas thongs (G-String) and we had a phenomenally bright Santa. Every one was having a good time.

Mabel was having so much fun he decided to do the twelve days of Christmas back check twice. Smiffo by this stage had decided that he was on a one man mission to get back to the beer ASAP. To prevent this, the hares had to cheat and call the trail themselves. If we hadn't done this the hash would have missed our ANUS's, so we feel entirely justified in our actions.

Back at the village hall it was party time. The circle was held inside because it was too dark and cold. Are we getting soft or what. Awards were given to Flo for her phenomenally impressive 452nd run. Hinge and Bracket both got their deca awards. Ringer was handed the brand new, no expense spared, P.O.S.H. trophy. For those that don’t know P.O.S.H. stands for Prestigious Office of the Supreme Hasher and the trophy is given to the hasher that has attended the highest number of runs since the last time it was handed out. Private Parts & Captain Fantaaastic jointly got awarded the Layer of the Year trophy for each laying eight runs during the year. The RA got given the Good Crack award by Flo who was acting in her rightful capacity as the reserve hare. The RA gave us all a long lecture on hash non-rules and in particular roles and responsibilities of various committee members.

By the way, Father Xmas has sent a letter to the hash and says that he really enjoyed singing with the hash choir (Santa's Belles). As for Santa himself: he came, he went, it's quite obvious that he's a very handsome gent.

Have a great Xmas everyone

On-On to the first run of 2006 in Little Wymondley at chez BOF & Stallion's

L&K Walnut Whip Willy, Knobber & Captain Fantaaastic