Run No. 727 1st August 2005

The Greyhound, Haynes

Runners:  20
Mutts:  -
Ankle Biters:  -
Knitting Circle:  -
Apres:  -
Newies/Returnees:  -

(The next run is from Dan Dare & Mekon's Gaff in Bygrave)

Had quite a hectic weekend, what with driving the family overnight to St Malo via Dover and Calais. Got back to the UK on Sunday night so clearly had no opportunity to lay the run before Monday.

The plan was to get to W*** early so that I could lay the run in the afternoon. Unfortunately, I could not get up early, so I had to take a half days holiday instead.

Actually, I quite enjoyed laying the run, even though I did miss the company of an assistant hare.

The circle was called by Ringer. No birthdays this week (or at least no-one was prepared to admit it) and so it was over to the hare. There was not much to say about the run - no hazards to speak of, so the pack set off pretty much on time.

It was right out of the pub, down the long hill to the first falsie. This of course meant that the pack had to pass the pub again. Shagpile did not make his usual call of on-inn at this point - maybe he is mellowing in his dotage (dotage! Physician heal thy self- ED).

A ladies check was positioned at the first footpath. Screamer complained bitterly at this point claiming that she was no lady. Despite the gender confusion, she was eventually coerced into checking the trail anyway. Sure enough it was false.

A few unlikely route choices, coupled with the occasional numbered check had the desired affect of keeping the pack closely knit. I would like to mention that, as you would expect, the numbered checks caught out the usual FRB contingent (i.e. the likes of Smiffo, Five Baah, MLP, Knobber etc) but what perhaps wasn't expected is that on practically every occasion Hairy Gussett was also one of the FRBs.

The one bit of subterfuge that I was most proud of was the short cut which forced the fitter members down a long, steep footpath. This in fact was just a detour to allow the short cutters to make some ground. At the bottom of the hill a false trail was laid which forced the FRBs back up the hill and down the original short-cut trail. Whilst I recognise that this was not exactly cricket, it did have the desired affect and at times like this you really do have to try to remember the first rule of hashing.

The hash continued and shortly reached the highest point that provided some spectacular views of the Bedfordshire countryside. The next numbered check allowed to the pack to regroup. From here it was down the hill, and along the new foot-path towards Chicksands Woods.

From the check point, Count Roadkill sets the pace and finds the trail into the woods. He never looked that committed to the cause and sure enough soon found the false trail. Smiffo on the other hand, looked supremely confident and sets off up the road towards the footpath. Again this was false, which forced the hash to take the path towards Standalone Farm thereby taking the totally pointless, but extremely satisfying loop (please note that this is written from the hares POV).

From here it was not much further and the pack eventually finds the On-Inn, after which it's a small climb back to the pub. The first runner got in at 50mins, so it was a fairly short, but nonetheless pleasant run. It was in fact a reaction to the guilt I recently felt about my previous 90 minute Shefford run.

It was nice to see the late arrivals (i.e. Dan-Dare, Mekon, Alex & Fliss) at the pub. They tried to make some excuse about just having returned from France. Intriguingly Fifi had made the latter part of the run, but minus any handler.

Ringer calls the circle and awards were given to Capt F for his supreme haring and Bell End who was finally united with his 200th award. He seemed genuinely excited to have received the last white kit-bag off the production line. The RA, the esteemed Private Parts gave further awards to Knobber (for I don't know what), Screamer (for I don't know what), MLP (no idea) and Capt F (I can't even remember that one), etc. I really must see that doctor about my memory span.

After further deliberation (i.e. asking around) it was deduced that the down-down to Knobber was for noticing another hasher's apparatus.

On-on to run 728 at chez Dan-Dares & Mekon's

L&K (???- Ed)

Capt F