Saturday morning, 7:00am. I am standing on the Naze overlooking the sea and the weather is dull and overcast. At least it's not raining. Five minutes into laying the trail and the heavens open up and I am completely soaked to the skin.

At 11:30 the Hash and families have arrived and it's time to circle up. We have one Newie - Admiral's Dad, AKA Mouldy Old Bastard and Cardiac is celebrating his nth wedding anniversary. With the co-hare watching rugby (Shaggy's brother-in-law), it's up to me to do all the haring so it's time to Check It Out. Smiffo, Pecker, Stallion and Penetrator run off in the wrong direction, while Shagpile finds the dust and 'ONON' is called. Bell End finds the first (ladies) check which is quickly checked out by Underlay and Ringkisser. Loads of confusion until I point (!!) Underlay back onto the trail.

Cardiac leads the pack to a held check. More confusion and Pecker manages to run two false trails. Smiffo asks if I have actually laid a trail as he hadn't seen any dust so far! More false trails are found until surprise - surprise, Smiffo calls the ON. A nice road section leads into the leisure park up to yet another held check.

Pecker leads the pack into the town centre (funny, as I hadn't laid any dust that way) so I holler "False Trail". Smiffo and Bell End both find other falsies and just when all options seem to have been checked a cry of "OnOn" is heard as the dust is found on the beach. The pack follow the trail along the sand (well sort of, as the tide had come in early*). More checks, more falsies, more moaning from the pack. Someone even said how cunning I had been, (I think I heard that right).

The trail continued along the sea wall and up to a check which then led up the cliff path and back onto the Naze.

Down-Downs were awarded to Ringkisser for pointing and molesting a young male hasher, Mouldy Old Bastard for being a newie and Shagpile for not controlling his dog in the circle. Thanks to everyone who turned up and hope to do it all again next year.

ONON - Shaggy

Editorial extra: Following the run we adjourned to a sea front tavern for beer while the ankle biters played pool. For fodder, Shaggy had arranged a slap-up meal at Mrs Miggin's Pie and Fish shop (luckily we had dressed down or we wouldn't have got in). After this, those with sprogs and those with a gambling problem went to the Walton pier to put pennies in the slots and ride on the dodgems. Others who know where the priorities in life lie went to a slightly better pub for more beer and a blather. For some strange reason your scribe then went home, still only half full and I hadn't had my winkle quota either. Must try harder next year, but RA-RA to Shaggy for organising it.

*BTW - Shaggy indicates that there was an aberration in the predicted high tide time. I don't think so!
Tide, periodic rise and fall of all ocean waters, including those of open sea, gulfs, and bays, results from the gravitational attraction of the Moon and the Sun upon the water and upon the Earth itself.

and from the Walton tide timetables

Saturday 7 July 2001

00:16  5.24m  06:36  1.12m
12:37  5.16m  18:43  0.90m

Shaggy strongly resisted being rechristened 'Stupid Canute'